Sunday, January 30, 2022

SEARCHING SERENITY


BAND NAME: Searching Serenity
GENRE: Hardcore / Metalcore / Deathcore
STATUS: Active
LOCATION: Jacksonville, Florida

Lineup:
Robert Bloebaum - Everything

Past members:
Marcus DeLoach - Vocals
Douglas Manzone - Drums

Links:


Discography:


Dark Horse (single, February 21, 2015, Independent) (Digital)

1. Dark Horse (Katy Perry cover) 3:16




Searching Serenity (EP, February 27, 2015, Independent) (CD, Digital)

1. Monstrum 3:51
Blood, fresh from an unwilling donor
Darkness surrounds me
Waiting to sink its teeth into flesh
Your desires and lust
They tremble before their death

Eternal dead will walk again
Living damnation, caged undeath
Kill them, burn them, end them, chase them
Leed on their agony till you're content
Hell on earth has come to us
The fog entangles our minds
Angels weep in silence at the days yet to come
I have seen the pain and the demise unlike
Anything you've seen
Innocence tainted by hate petrified embrace
Your, your pain and blood sustain me

Hell on earth has come to us
The fog entangles our minds
Angels weep in silence at the days yet to come

I cannot, I cannot
I cannot take this

I've killed so many
Their lives cut short
Freaks of nature that should stay in their graves
Until the end of time

Blood, fresh from an unwilling donor
Darkness surrounds me
Waiting to sink its teeth into flesh
Tour desires and lust
They tremble before their death

Your pain and blood are what sustain my life
Hell on earth has come to us
The fog entangles our minds
Angels weep in silence at the days yet to come

Petrified embrace
Your pain and blood sustain me

2. Betrayer 3:20
You feed off the scraps
You'll settle for anything
Not giving back, just taking away
Your misconception is your downfall
Thinking you hold the hand of God
But you won't get to me that easily

You know the words I sing to you
They don't mean anything
Yourself is all that you have left
You're dead inside
Taking flight to find your next meal
We know you don't have time to feel
So many before you find who's next
Waiting around, just fix your mess

Psychological warfare with me is all that you desire
Clipping my wings as you pull the strings
Won't ever happen again!
You cannot hurt me
You're tangled in my web
Try to fill me with misery
But I'm a creature breaking out of its cage
You can't stop me

You know the words I sing to you
They don't mean anything
Yourself is all that you have left
You're dead inside
Taking flight to find your next meal
We know you don't have time to feel
So many before you find who's next
Waiting around, just fix your mess

You are full of lies
This is what you've become
Betrayer!
Betrayer!

You know the words I sing to you
They don't mean anything
Yourself is all that you have left
You're dead inside
Taking flight to find your next meal
We know you don't have time to feel
So many before you find who's next
Waiting around, just fix your mess

3. Destructive Mind 3:39
4. The Road Most Traveled 4:37
5. Breakneck 4:11




Destructive Mind (Acoustic) (single)

October 11, 2015, Independent (Digital)
December 16, 2015, Independent (Digital)

1. Destructive Mind (Acoustic) 3:31




Mortifer: Bearer Of Death (EP)

2016, Independent (CD-ROM)
May 6, 2016, Independent (Digital)
May 21, 2016, Independent (Digital)
March 7, 2023, Independent (CD-R)

1. Grass Withers, Flowers Fade 3:11
All you've been given
It can be taken away
It can be taken away

Grasp what you love
Take all you know
And hold it close
My friends
The end is nigh

Plundering the shards of yourself
Trying to find where it all went wrong
Not knowing what's really to come
You've been deceived be your shadow
Paranoid and crippled

Your might has been worn thin
Twisted and ripped
From the very marrow of your bones
My friends' voices fill the air no more
Ashes to the wind
Living doesn't seem
To be so easy

My might has been worn thin
Twisted and ripped from the very marrow of my bones
If my life were to be taken at this very moment
My mind would be at ease
I would rest in peace
I'd rest in peace

2. Abedah 3:27
3. Escape 3:31
4. Retaliation At Its Best 4:02
5. Cataclysm 3:26
6. Mortifer: Bearer Of Death 3:25




Genesis (The Beginning) (album)

February 9, 2018, Independent (Digital)
September 2, 2018, Independent (Digital)
March 7, 2023, Independent (CD-R)

1. Destiny 1:38
2. Genesis (The Beginning) 4:24
3. Rampant Evil 5:07
4. Downfall 3:09
5. What Has Come Of This World? 2:56
6. Prophetic Visions 4:48
7. Eternal Declarations 3:04
8. The Journey 3:21
9. Bloody Memories 2:59




Revelation (The End) (album)

April 18, 2019, Independent (Digital)
April 19, 2019, Independent (Digital)
March 7, 2023, Independent (CD-R)

1. The Beginning Of The End 1:26
2. The Great Co(Mission) 3:11
3. False Prophet 3:08
4. The Decimation Of Sin 4:20
5. Cleansed Eternal 4:06
6. Personal Hell 4:04
7. Eden 1:58
8. Scourge 2:49
9. Lost, Yet Found 4:05
10. Revelation (The End) 3:44




Searching Serenity (EP)

August 1, 2019, Independent (Digital)
March 7, 2023, Independent (CD-R)

A remake of the self-titled debut EP.

DIGITAL TRACKLIST
1. Monstrum 4:00
2. Betrayer 3:42
3. Destructive Mind 3:44
4. The Road Most Traveled 4:36
5. Breakneck 4:15
6. Dark Horse (Katy Perry cover) 3:17

CD-R TRACKLIST
1. Betrayer 3:42
2. Monstrum 4:00
3. Destructive Mind 3:44
4. The Road Most Traveled 4:36
5. Breakneck 4:15
6. Betrayer (2015 Mix) 3:20
7. Monstrum (2015 Mix) 3:51
8. Destructive Mind (2015 Mix) 3:39
9. The Road Most Traveled (2015 Mix) 4:37
10. Breakneck (2015 Mix) 4:11




Isolation (EP)

March 21, 2020, Independent (Digital)
April 1, 2020, Independent (Digital)
March 7, 2023, Independent (CD-R)

1. Fallen Angel 2:22
2. The Possession 3:02
3. Fear Tactic 3:49
4. Never Alone 5:34
5. Nephilim 3:37
6. Never Alone (Acoustic) 5:34




Soundtrack To Your Christmas (EP, November 26, 2020, Independent) (Digital)

1. Away In A Manger 1:50
2. O Holy Night 4:42
3. Carol Of The Bells 2:37
4. Hark The Herald Angels Sing 3:10
5. The 12 Days Of Metal-Mass 4:24
6. Winter Solace 4:00




The Struggles Of The Earthly Ones (album)

April 16, 2021, Independent (Digital)
April 17, 2021, Independent (Digital)
March 7, 2023, Independent (CD-R)

1. Prelude 2:02
Seek the Lord
The healer of Sins
His grace pours out
For those who trust

2. The Coveter 3:30
"He coveteth greedily all the day long:
But the righteous giveth and spareth not"
(Proverbs 21:26)

The possessions of others
Are not your own
To take what is not yours
Is to betray the Lord

The spirit of the Lord is that of a giver
Love your neighbor
Reject yourself
Give wholeheartedly without greed

3. The Doubting 4:23
Cross my heart and hope to die
I gave you my faith, I gave you my life

I need a sign
Of your presence
This world is broken beyond repair
I'm struggling to feel you there

Your plan is taught to be greater
Than our understanding
It's said the plan for the world
Is all in Your hands

Reaching out to the heavens
I feel my life slip away
Send me a dove from your world above
So I know you aren't absent from me

Satan comes and provides doubt
Are you even real?
Do you even hear my please for you?
He preys on me like a helpless sheep
Knowing my faith is present despite my constant worries and doubts and fears

"Faith is confidence in what we hope for
And assurance about what
We do not see"
(Hebrews 11:1)

4. The Brokenhearted 3:19
"He will wipe
Every tear
From their eyes

There will be no more death
Our mourning, crying, nor pain

For the old order of things
Has passed away"
(Revelation 21:4)

The pains of life
The thorn of love
The deeds of those
Who care not what they do

They break those close
With no remorse
Left broken and bleeding

Heal my wounds and make me whole
Give me strength to carry on
Tell me You are bigger than my pain
So I may worship You

They tear and rip
They steal my solace
Providing nothing beyond pain and sadness

My heart has broken for the ones of the world
Like Yours breaks for those who do not follow
Heal my wounds and make me whole
So I may worship You

5. The Thief 3:36
"He who robs his father or his mother
And says it is not a transgression
Is the companion of a man who destroys"
(Proverbs 28:24)

Believing in a way of life
Where goods are open
For the taking
Precious and loved by those who own them

Available to steal with no proper thought
Your disregard for the possession of your brother
Reveals your heart
Full of greed
Lacking in love

Betrayal of a friend
Stings like a hornet
The pain seeps beneath the surface

6. The Liar 3:38
"For all that is secret
Will eventually be brought
Into the open

And everything that is concealed
Will be brought to light
And made known to all"
(Luke 8:17)

Acting as one with knowledge
Ill intent, goals to lead astray
Misinformation spreading like wildfire
Burning the forests of belief and truth

Desires to deceit
Hiding the light of truth
Acting as the evil one
You harm those in your path

7. The Haughty 3:39
One of a kind
Your world revolves
Around yourself
At the expense
Of those you know and love

"Everyone who is arrogant in heart
Is an abomination
To the Lord
Be assured
He will not
Go unpunished"
(Proverbs 16:5)

You put yourself before others
Driving stakes and burning bridges
Causing harm for your own gain
All to feed your self-righteous egotistical mentality

Deep in the mind of the prideful being
Tormented by pain and doubt
Tearing others down to lift yourself up
You seek no healing, just destruction

Unshackle the bonds
Of pride
Give to others
As they to you

8. The Absence Of Pain 3:54
(Instrumental)

9. The Wicked 3:35
"Woe to those who devise wickedness
And work evil on their beds!
When the morning dawns
They perform it
Because it is in the power of their hand"
(Micah 2:1)

Evil actions
Dark power
Things of this world
Not of the Lord

Seek not ways to serve evil
Driving out light
Inviting in darkness
Casting words in the name of Satan
Actions without intent of holy worship

Discernment and clarity for what is right
The knowledge of good and evil
Putting oneself into a plight
In the name of all that is wrong

10. The Abuser 3:25
"If anyone causes one of these little ones
Those who believe in me, to stumble
It would be better for them to have
A large millstone hung around their neck
And to be drowned in the depths of the sea"
(Matthew 18:6)

The precious life of the young and naive
Sinful by nature, but unknowing of the world

To take advantage through your own selfish deeds
Of those who know not how to defend

Seeking pleasure from the innocent
Causing harm for your own gain

Taking what is not yours
Torturing the soul of a poor little one

Evil seeps from your every word
Your actions reflect the darkness of your heart

Your mind focuses not on things of God
Just on the sins of the world and your own disgusting gain

Life is a precious gift
From the creator
Tarnish it
And you will be doomed

Tie a millstone around your neck
And jump in the sea!

11. The Murderer 3:01
"Beloved, never avenge yourselves
But leave it to the wrath of God
For it is written
'Vengeance is mine
I will repay,' says the Lord"
(Romans 12:9)

The sacredness of our lives
Made in the holy image of the Father
Taken lightly as if unspectacular
Is detestable to the Lord

To take the life of a fellow being
Is to take the role of the almighty creator
Who giveth and taketh
Through His own personal will

Your life is not your own
Nor is the life of another man yours to take
But glory to God in the highest
Who gives us life and is in control

12. The Villain 3:46
Villainous intent
Malicious atrocities
Driving away peace
Bringing in destruction

Knitting fear into the people
Of the world
One by one
Causing mayhem and discontent
All in the name of division

"Whoever makes a practice of sinning
Is of the devil
For the devil has been sinning from the beginning
The reason the Son of God appeared
Was to destroy the works of the devil"
(1 John 3:8)

The desire to gain justice
To avenge the fallen
The hope to bring to light
Those who are living in the dark

This is the will of the Lord
Not that we may fix the world
In our own power
But to live in His will
For us
Allowing Him to take his place
As the rightful judge of all

Satan works within one's soul
Feeding desires to hurt and cause pain
Seek now ways to bruise your neighbor
Instead seek light
Evade becoming the villain

13. The Struggles Of The Earthly Ones 3:15
Human beings born into sin
No escape through our own doing
No hope without the work of the Lord
Seek not how you may save yourself
Seek the Lord to take away your sin

We fight and struggle
To find our own path
Yearning to heal
Hoping to end the pain
God the Father
Who sent His son
Gives us eternal life
Through letting go of ourselves
To trust in Him

"For I consider that the sufferings
Of this present time
Are not worthy comparing
With the glory that is to be revealed to us"
(Romans 8:18)




Instrumentals, Vol. 1 (compilation, May 16, 2021, Independent) (Digital)

Instrumental versions of tracks from the following releases...
Tracks 1-5 are from the self-titled EP.
Tracks 6-11 are from "Mortifer: Bearer Of Death".
Tracks 12-19 are from "Genesis (The Beginning)".
Tracks 20-28 are from "Revelation (The End)".
Tracks 29-33 are from "Isolation".
Tracks 34-45 are from "The Struggles Of The Earthly Ones".

1. Monstrum 4:01
2. Betrayer 3:33
3. Destructive Mind 3:40
4. The Road Most Traveled 4:42
5. Breakneck 4:13
6. Grass Withers, Flowers Fade 3:16
7. Abedah 3:37
8. Escape 3:31
9. Retaliation At Its Best 4:00
10. Cataclysm 3:21
11. Mortifer: Bearer Of Death 3:19
12. Destiny 1:38
13. Genesis (The Beginning) 4:24
14. Rampant Evil 5:05
15. Downfall 3:09
16. Prophetic Visions 4:48
17. Eternal Declarations 3:03
18. The Journey 3:19
19. Bloody Memories 2:57
20. The Beginning Of The End 1:26
21. The Great Co(Mission) 3:09
22. False Prophet 3:06
23. The Decimation Of Sin 4:20
24. Personal Hell 4:02
25. Cleansed Eternal 4:06
26. Scourge 2:47
27. Revelation (The End) 3:44
28. Lost, Yet Found 4:05
29. Fallen Angel 2:20
30. The Possession 3:01
31. Fear Tactic 3:45
32. Never Alone 5:33
33. Nephilim 3:19
34. Prelude 2:02
35. The Doubting 4:23
36. The Coveter 3:30
37. The Brokenhearted 3:19
38. The Thief 3:34
39. The Liar 3:37
40. The Haughty 3:39
41. The Wicked 3:35
42. The Abuser 3:25
43. The Murderer 3:01
44. The Villain 3:46
45. The Struggles Of The Earthly Ones 3:16




Tis' The Season (EP, November 25, 2021, Independent) (Digital)

1. Angels From The Realms Of Glory 3:46
2. Coventry Carol 3:36
3. What Child Is This 3:42
4. We Three Kings 3:32
5. I Saw Three Ships 3:35




Mortifer: Bearer Of Death (Live) (EP, December 19, 2021, Independent) (Digital)

1. Grass Withers, Flowers Fade 3:19
2. Abedah 3:21
3. Escape 3:36
4. Retaliation At Its Best 4:00
5. Cataclysm 3:33
6. Mortifer: Bearer Of Death 3:42




Desolate (single, January 23, 2022, Independent) (Digital)

1. Desolate 4:02




Darkness (album)

June 10, 2022, Independent (Digital)
February 27, 2023, Independent (CD-R)

The CD-R only contains tracks 1-10.  The other instrumental tracks are digital-exclusive.

1. Disarray 2:40
"Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap."
(Galatians 6:7)

The hand of God gives guidance to the followers, the wrath of God gives justice to the Denier

2. I Won't Bow Down 4:17
I WON'T BOW DOWN
TO THIS WORLD'S IDOLS
CUT OUT MY PRIDE
REPLACE IT WITH YOU

Worldly ways aren't reflections of Your heavenly kingdom.
I won't cherish a false idol as if it is my god.
Putting things on a pedestal as if to imply that they are greater than You.
Pushing an ideal to the world to bring others down and lift their eyes towards things that cannot heal them.
Driving people to a point of insanity wishing they could be something they are not all in the name of vanity.
Humble yourself in the sight of the world.

3. Avarice 2:49
Lay down your Cross.
At the feet of the mighty Savior.
The evils of the world tarnish those of good heart and deceit crawls into one's mind to drive them from His almighty embrace.
Set apart from the ways of evil, stand for the ways of heaven and seek righteousness through His empowering Spirit.
"Seek Yahweh and live or He will spread like fire throughout the house of Joseph."
(Amos 5:6)
The evil one lies and tempts to bring us closer to his dwelling, tricky and meticulous with his intent to destroy our lives.
The Spirit of the Lord drives away his darkness and brings peace and healing to those who believe in His power and grace.
He judges not by appearance but by the content of one's heart.

4. Maltreatment Against The Body 3:58
"Those who turn justice into wormwood throw righteousness to the ground."
(Amos 5:7)

The God of justice has wept at the mistreatment of His creation between one another.
Allowing divisiveness to drive an unholy wedge betwixt the people initially created. to have unity amongst one another.
Do you desire to have hatred in your life?
Do you seek to have negativity looming at all times?
Put your injustice aside and seek refuge in the comfort of God's presence.
Allow Him to drive you towards unity and away from unrighteousness, away from unrighteousness, choices designed to afflict members of His body.

Carving out your own self-respect and ability to treat others with dignity.

5. Hymn For The Fallen 3:26
(Instrumental)

6. Melancholia 4:34
"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand."
(Isaiah 40:10)

These darkened depths take hold of me.
Pulling me down further and further.

My soul is weak and my heart feels empty.
These vicious demons hold me in their grasp, stabbing without mercy.
I seek to find fulfillment.
Lord save me from this pain.

I seek not to fill myself with foolish things of this world, but I seek to be filled by Your Holy Spirit.
Give me the strength to prevail past these attacks on my life.
Fill my heart, fill my soul.
Give Your strength to me oh Lord.

Almighty Father, the Great I Am, Lord Jesus Christ, I plead to You.

Seek my heart.
Change my life.
Lend me thy rod and thy staff.

Pushing through these evils, I can feel You with me.
Guiding me step by step along the way.
Pushing through these evils, I can feel You with me.
Guiding me step by step along the way.

7. Hubristic 3:52
"He knows us far better than we know ourselves, knows our pregnant condition, and keeps us present before God."
(Romans 8:27)
People of knowledge, weak and great, putting down the God of this universe with the belief that their understanding is superior compared to the one who set the world into motion.
The Lord of this universe has the understanding of His creation better than we could ever hope, but individual pride drives naysayers towards the idea that they know better.
Set your spirit on seeking to deeply understand His heart and you will find that His love and care is deeper than one could ever imagine.
In the end of time on earth as it is we will understand once and for all that His power and love for us is truly for us and not to hurt us.

8. Trauma 4:18
Suffering through the pains of life.
Caught in the web entangled by physical, emotional and mental torment, causing sadness and grief abound.
My life for the Lord feels dimly lit through the trails put before me day by day.
The ones sent to love me cause me sorrow.
My despondency has driven me near the point of no return, the shadows of this feeling creeping closer than ever.
The only way out is through the comfort of one more understanding than even myself.
He is the way through this pain.
He can heal me from my darkened spirits.
God Almighty, I pray to you in a time of great need.
Send convictions to those who betray me.
Send remorse to those who hurt me.
Heal those who need Your healing.
Send grace to those who seek You.

9. Apartheid Populace 3:13
Created to be one in the body of Christ.
Torn apart through the work of the Devil's hands.
"Hate evil and love good, establish justice in the gate."
(Amos 5:15a)
The division we face is such a disgrace in the face of the Lord's perfect design.
Seven billion reflecting the one, set apart by opinionated difference with no validation.
Children of God seeking to put down their neighbor as if justifying placing one above the other.
"Stop judging by mere appearance, but instead judge correctly."
(John 7:24)
Find unity amongst one another in the ways we are made the same.
Find peace with those you've designated as your enemy.
We are one in the sane in the image of God.
We are His children, created equal in His eyes.
"There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus."
(Galatians 3:28)

10. Subjective Objection 3:48
"The fool hath said in his heart, There is no God.
They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good."
(Psalm 14:1)

Denying the existence of God the creator and accepting life as a meaningless existence followed by an empty nothingness.
The belief that having morality is solely a subjective choice driven by nothing more than ignorance.
Believing absolute truth to be a figment of the general population's imagination.
God the creator gave us a conscience to drive us towards recognition of right and wrong.
The Lord's provision and existence made apparent throughout the world, through the acts of others, through the miracles of life.
His promise was never that life would be easy.
His promise was that He would be with us through it all.
Trust in Him and trust that His love for you is greater than anything else.
Don't walk this world alone when there's a Father waiting to embrace you with loving, open arms.

11. Disarray (Instrumental) 2:40
12. I Won't Bow Down (Instrumental) 4:17
13. Avarice (Instrumental) 2:49
14. Maltreatment Against The Body (Instrumental) 3:58
15. Melancholia (Instrumental) 4:34
16. Hubristic (Instrumental) 3:52
17. Trauma (Instrumental) 4:18
18. Apartheid Populace (Instrumental) 3:13
19. Subjective Objection (Instrumental) 3:48




My Prayer (single, January 20, 2023, Independent) (Digital)

1. My Prayer 3:39
As I scream up into the heavens, bowing my head to you
I pray you hear these words, Lord hear my prayer
I need you now
I lift these words in a time of great trial to the God above who is over all I know
Your divinity is beyond my comprehension
Your sovereignty is greater than anything I can imagine
Meticulously crafting together the world through nothing but your words
How dare I deem myself capable of knowing better than You




Retribution (album)

July 7, 2023, Independent (CD-R, Digital, 12" Vinyl)

The vinyl release does not include track 6.

1. Eternal Suffering 2:02
ETERNAL SUFFERING!

2. The Curse Of Ymir 3:01
We are cursed
Plagued by this generational darkness rooted in pride and self glorification
This sinful nature with us, since the fall of man, we are cursed
The pain and toil
Is overwhelming
The Lord thy God
Save us through Your grace
The war was waged, the battles commence, the good shall reign, the world is saved
The curse of sin runs through the minds of all who walk this planet
Mental fortitude broken by Satan's torment of our mind
Through the grace of God, his bountiful forgiveness, we are given the chance to be redeemed
Place your faith in Him within your heart

3. The Hidden Village Of Light 4:37
Living amongst the tyrannical dynasty of evil drives me mad day by day
Swimming against the current and fighting against the grain
The lawless nature of this earthly realm darkens endlessly
The hidden realm so sweet and pure
No evil shall ever take away its dazzling light
This place has been prepared for us by the one who sits upon the mighty throne
His loud voice rumbles as everyone trembles at His glorious might
Where your treasure is there your heart shall be
The heavens declare the glory of God
And the expanse proclaims the work of His hands
Storing up these treasures in heaven
Trusting in Your mighty plan to come to fruition
Praying that Your sovereignty would protect me from all who wish to harm
This world shall one day pass away to make way for the new heaven and new earth

4. The Lands Between 5:12
Desolation
The earth is not as it was
Evil crept in and took the place of peace
Plaguing the land
The devils ploy to destroy all humanity
Sent our land into a state of utter shock
Hatred of the Father who cast him down
A desire to overtake Him as the new ruler
The angel of light cast from the sky
Sentenced to an eternity of suffering
Grasping for anyone he can pull down
He torments the minds of the citizens of earth
Day in, day out
Plaguing the minds of people
To distract them from God above
Jesus
My Savior
I call to thee
Protect me
From this torment

5. Winds Of Peace 4:02
Don't worry about anything
Present your requests to God
Pray honestly and trust faithfully
He will forever be standing with you
My heart shall forever be guarded by Christ
Believing in Him despite my limited understanding
He is my wonderful counselor
My faithful Guide
My trustworthy Father
My gracious redemption
Teach me to continually trust in You Lord
Show your grace when I am weak and Your presence when I am strong
You fill me with Your peace daily
May I proceed show this peace others
Fill me with the joy and peace that surpasses that which I receive on earth

6. The Shrine Of Fire 3:28
(Instrumental)

7. The Dark Tournament 4:13
War is waged in the spiritual realm
The fight between good and evil continually advances
The Lord is faithful to strengthen me
Protect me from the evil one
Worldly weapons are useless in this realm
The fight of the mind and spirit tears at me more and more
God's power to demolish is ever-present
The evil ones tremble in fear at the sight of His awesome power
We must be alert and of sober mind
Standing against the adversary with awareness and readiness
Satan's desire to tear us down and make us weak empowers him relentlessly, he shall fall in defeat when the final day draws near
We must resist his evil temptations
The spirit that fills us will give us this power

8. Fight Of The Valkyries 3:34
The King of Kings and Lord of Lords arrives
This final battle to end the era of pain and suffering has commenced
As the swarms fill the skies and the lands
The heavenly armies take their stand
As heaven opens and justice pours out, God's might is revealed
His armies pursuing to end evil's tyrannical reign on these lands
As the beast is captured it screams out in rage
He is thrown into the lake of fiery burning sulfur for eternal punishment
Satan shall pay for the destruction he has caused
The countless lives led astray through evil intention
Families broken and torn apart
Lives stolen from this world through wars and hatred
The angelic armies of God shall be led by the savior to the ultimate victory!

9. Hives Of Nekravol 4:46
Demonic influence rampaging through many
Tearing through the barriers of those who seek to play
This hive mind controlled by its evil source will forever chase their prey
Since the beginning in the garden
These demons have troubled and tortured the world
Creating disaster and plight for their own enjoyment
Tearing apart the fabric of peace for all
The evil ways of this world are not a reflection of our God above
The torment of life and nature of darkness shall be cast into the eternal flame to rot for all of eternity

10. The Ashen One 4:10
Fighting through this life on earth
Struggling to find my place
Learning to battle my faults and better myself
Roadblocks causing difficulties in my life
I'm eternally thankful for the sovereignty of Christ
Knowing He stands with me and knows my pain
Understanding the trauma and sadness of a life on earth
Empathizing with those who are lost and celebrating with those who are found
The gracious redemption granted by God is the greatest gift I've received
His desire to pursue me relentlessly gives comfort beyond understanding

11. My Prayer 3:39
As I scream up into the heavens, bowing my head to you
I pray you hear these words, Lord hear my prayer
I need you now
I lift these words in a time of great trial to the God above who is over all I know
Your divinity is beyond my comprehension
Your sovereignty is greater than anything I can imagine
Meticulously crafting together the world through nothing but your words
How dare I deem myself capable of knowing better than You

AS LIONS AND LAMBS

AS LIONS AND LAMBS

BAND NAME: As Lions And Lambs
GENRE: Metalcore / Deathcore
STATUS: Active
LOCATION: Lancaster, Pennsylvania

Lineup:
Matt McNamara - Vocals
Mitch Blank - Guitars
Dan Schweikert - Bass
Zach Blank - Drums

Past members:
Adam Snyder - Vocals

Links:


Discography:


Waves Of Fire (single, November 28, 2013, Independent) (Digital)

1. Waves Of Fire 3:47
We started a fire within
It's not hard to see
It will burn eternally
We have come alive
And we've been set on fire
Come now and taste the lies you have produced
Come now and see the disaster you have caused
Waves of fire will consume, consume everything
Bow down before him
See the glory pouring form his head
Come forth, experience the pain
The deceivers will fall
There's no getting away
Waves of fire will consume, consume everything
You can't get away
They'll carry you down, carry you down
The deceivers will fall
Waves, waves, waves, waves
Waves, waves, waves, waves
You'll meet the waves, and the Son will show
And now you'll see the end
What has been foretold, but ignored
Meet the one who you refused
We have come alive




Face The Storm (EP, October 24, 2014, Independent) (Digital)

1. Compass 4:25
2. Bearing The Mark 4:00
Raise your king up on a throne
Built on the shoulders of your own complacency
His regime is a product of rejection
There he stands
Your ruler and your destiny
There he stands

Put to death what is of this earth
Your lust, your greed, your impurity
Rid yourself of the malice within
You bear the mark of idolatry

Because of these
The wrath of God is coming
Because of these
The wrath of God is coming

No more, put it aside
No more, put it aside
You used to walk in these ways
In the life you once lived

You used to walk in these ways
In the life you used to live

3. Art Of Filth 3:55
4. Vessels Of Destruction 3:56
5. The Heart Of The Father 6:00




Bearing The Mark (single, February 27, 2015, Independent) (Digital)

A re-release from the EP "Face The Storm", with improved recording and new instrumentation.

1. Bearing The Mark 3:59
Raise your king up on a throne
Built on the shoulders of your own complacency
His regime is a product of rejection
There he stands
Your ruler and your destiny
There he stands

Put to death what is of this earth
Your lust, your greed, your impurity
Rid yourself of the malice within
You bear the mark of idolatry

Because of these
The wrath of God is coming
Because of these
The wrath of God is coming

No more, put it aside
No more, put it aside
You used to walk in these ways
In the life you once lived

You used to walk in these ways
In the life you used to live




Self:Righteous (single, October 24, 2015, Independent) (Digital)

1. Self:Righteous 4:39
You, you break my heart
Your self-righteous spirit tears my church apart
My tears run freely as rivers of pain
Mourning those killed for my name

You spit in my face
Yet my blood runs freely with grace
Yet you reject my gift
And choose to persecute those who refuse to bow down to you

I can hear the souls of the martyrs crying out
The voices of those who have been slain in my name
"How long, how long until your judgment comes and our blood is avenged"
You, you break my heart
Your self-righteous spirit tears my church apart
My tears run freely as rivers of pain
Mourning those killed for my name
You think you know my heart
But you don't truly see
Will you ever accept my love
Don't you see I can set you free

Tortured, burned and impaled
Beheaded on a stormy beach
By cowards with their faces veiled
Hung by ropes and stabbed in the heart
Because of your evil deeds I'm torn apart
I'm torn apart

You've made him twice as much a son of hell

I ache for those I love
I am filled with pain
Their souls will rise above
They will rise above

My heart lies on the ground
Shattered by your ignorant words
These faithful few are far more righteous than you
You are the unholy ones

You are savages
Contorting my will for all mankind
You are murderers
Will you ever understand my heart




Lightbearer (album)

April 22, 2016, Independent (Digital)
October 24, 2016, Independent, Instrumentals (Digital)
October 21, 2017, Independent, Extended Edition (Digital)

1. Stephen 4:10
I hear them coming to drag me away
I hear them coming but I won't run away
I'll stand trial for my King
For He has already bought my victory

Do what you will
The best is yet to come for me

I stand for my God
And His Son at the right of His throne

The Son you killed, He rose again
The Son you killed is the light for men
The Son you killed is my salvation
The Son you killed offers you salvation

Yet you are stiff-necked and set in your ways
Just as your fathers did you deny God's way
How many prophets turned away in dismay
As you chase kingdoms that will burn today

Don't you see God's plan in all things
His story painted through our history
From our covenant father to Calvary
His work has always bought our victory
We've been stranded in the desert
We've been beaten as slaves
And everyone that has been sent
You either killed or sent away
But all the pain and scars were designed by the maker
The path He planned for the ultimate Savior

Now I will join the masses of martyrs

I see Heaven opening up
The clouds part to clear my view
I see Christ standing at the right hand of God
Wearing a crown as king
I see Heaven opening up
The clouds part to clear my view
I see Christ standing at the right hand of God
His arms outstretched, He's calling me home

Father forgive them

Take this body
End this life
Crush this body
Begin afterlife

2. Self Righteous 4:36
You, you break my heart
Your self-righteous spirit tears my church apart
My tears run freely as rivers of pain
Mourning those killed for my name

You spit in my face
Yet my blood runs freely with grace
Yet you reject my gift
And choose to persecute those who refuse to bow down to you

I can hear the souls of the martyrs crying out
The voices of those who have been slain in my name
"How long, how long until your judgment comes and our blood is avenged"
You, you break my heart
Your self-righteous spirit tears my church apart
My tears run freely as rivers of pain
Mourning those killed for my name
You think you know my heart
But you don't truly see
Will you ever accept my love
Don't you see I can set you free

Tortured, burned and impaled
Beheaded on a stormy beach
By cowards with their faces veiled
Hung by ropes and stabbed in the heart
Because of your evil deeds I'm torn apart
I'm torn apart

You've made him twice as much a son of hell

I ache for those I love
I am filled with pain
Their souls will rise above
They will rise above

My heart lies on the ground
Shattered by your ignorant words
These faithful few are far more righteous than you
You are the unholy ones

You are savages
Contorting my will for all mankind
You are murderers
Will you ever understand my heart

3. Fury 5:17
Lay your cloaks at my feet if you're here for the killing
If this one's a shepherd then we'll scatter his sheep
They'll flee from the sounds of our feet as we cleanse this land of heresy
Our homeland will be made whole again

I will crucify every one of these men
None of these followers will rise again
The women and the children led away in chains
We'll see what becomes of this Christ's name
I will snuff out their candle, pull the wick from within
This way cannot be a light for them
Our ways have been set through the generations
As traditions for God's chosen nation

Who do they think they are
What do they think this is
There is no room for this heresy and I am licensed to kill

I was trained from an early age
Our laws are my passion
I was brought up in the only way
To protect it is my mission
I will do my part
To train this generation
I will do my part
To protect this, my nation

I am the very hand of God
His talons outstretched as I deal out death
I will strike, like a hammer on an anvil
Strike, strike, strike until there's nothing left

I am Saul, Saul of Tarsus
Learn to fear my name
I am Saul, Saul of Tarsus
I will end this "way"

4. Redirection 4:04
So, you say your name is Saul
You say you'll end My Way
Saul, I'm the one who made you Saul
What can you do to stand against Me

Is it hard to kick against the goads
Don't you feel the pain as you stray from My way
Oh don't you feel My pain, don't you feel the pain
The pain of seeing a son so turned against My name

I am the truth you could not find
So let Me show you who I am

I am the one they crucified
I am the Christ that you deny
The men you killed, they stood for Me
Your hate binds you, I will set you free

I will bring you back
This is the voice of me calling you
I will bring you back
You'll be a light to call others homes

I'll send you out into the darkness
You'll be a light for me
Through you ears will be opened
Blind eyes will see

You closed your mind, I'll close your eyes
You'll never shut me out again
The one who will open your eyes
Is one you would have despised

I'll show you the multitude of suffering that will be yours
You will be despised as you follow My name

You will be put in prison, you will be stoned
You'll be shut out, cast out, shipwrecked and left alone
Abandoned by your kin
And prisoner in a strange land

The path you're on brings suffering
I will bear you up
The road you're on is paved with hardship
I will be your strength
I made you for this
The vessel for this message
(You will) go forth to the Gentiles
Bring to them My light and life

5. Saul:Paul 2:19
6. Blind Sight 3:57
I'm blind, what have you done to me
You said that I was chained, and you would set me free
But I thought I waged war for You
Was my faith so misconstrued

Where is the angry God
The God who hates heresy
Where is the God I thought I knew
I thought that I was following after You

It's been three days, I still can't see
But You are getting through to me
I still don't fully understand
But Christ please set me free

Set me free

God please open my eyes, I wanna see your glory shine
My spirit is awakening
Your love and mercy are covering me
I finally see the person I'm supposed to be and am called to be

My child, don't you ever forget
That I loved you
Before you ever loved Me
And I had a plan for you
When I set you free

If you carry your cross and run the race
I promise one day you'll see My face
You will claim the final victory
As long as you follow after Me

I will carry my cross and run the race
I know that one day I'll see Your face
I will claim the final victory
As long as I go where You're leading Me

I will build where I once laid waste
I will love with a heart that only carried hate
I spent my life tearing down the only true foundation
And now I'll built it up

I will go to the ends of the earth
To proclaim Your name and Your worth
Over the land or on the story sea
I'm on Your mission to set souls free

Set souls free

He touched my eyes, the scales came off
He cleansed my mind, the scales are gone
For the first time in my life I've opened up my eyes
The deceiver is defeated, I'm no longer blind

7. Inner War 3:53
I am at war with myself, things never seem to change
Every time I win this fight, I wake to find myself in chains
Over and over and over again
Over and over still I cannot win
This war has dragged on for so many years
That I will not overcome is my biggest fear

I do what I don't want, and don't do what I want to do
This dichotomy is killing me
Thank God for a Savior

I am a liar and a hypocrite
The chief of sinners
Please save me from myself

I am my own worst enemy
What I hate most wells up from within
Everything from my former self
Is holding me back, is promoting my sin
All the good I want to do
Is left to die as I give in
All the evil desensitizes
My most effective anodyne

I need to fight this evil
I need to accept the truth
That Christ came into the world to save its sinners
Of whom I am the worst
I am the worst of sinners
I am shown mercy so that in me
His patience is on full display
So why is my spirit at war, why can't I follow his way

I am at war with myself

It's the same old thing, over and over
The same old thing, again and again

Every time I pull this thorn from my skin
I feel it tearing my flesh again
And every time I think I've won
It digs and it digs until I'm overcome

It's the same old thing, over and over
The same old thing, again and again

8. Jews And Djentiles 5:03
We were all dead
Rotting, empty, broken, hopelessly gone
Blindly following the dictator of the unseen world
Yes I was a dead man
Committing crime and killing Christ
Condoning corruption just to see God's demise
I was dead inside

We all lived in darkness
We had no sense of consequence
Trapped in a lie we were blinded
The perfect contrast against righteousness
We all lived in darkness
We had no sense of consequence

Despite the filth
And through our guilt
Our father gave us new life
He breathed his life into us
Giving us true purpose, now we are finally free
He made us new creations, shattered our past and showed us what we were made to be

Made to be

Our lives taken by the potter's hands and made new again

We're born again, we have vitality
Proclaim his name for the world to see

He gave us new life and made us new
Through his mercy, not our merit, not through anything we do

This life is a gift for all who believe
Possession of this salvation does not make us better than others, rather humble servants and ambassadors for Christ's sake
Pick it up
This is a gift, this is a call
Use it for the kingdom or you'll waste it all
This is a gift, this is a call
Use it for the kingdom or you'll waste it all

Resurrect
Resurrect, resurrect me now

Salvation isn't meant to be confined
Preach the good news to the rest of human kind
Proclaim it to the beat down, lost, and gone
The ones left behind
Be the one to show them what true love
Looks like

9. Hands And Feet 1:29
10. Longsuffering 5:12
My life is a story of transformation and submission
I was saved as a young man from the evil of my own plans

God's faithfulness on full display
He's been with me day after day
I've been to the far corners of the earth
Grateful for His grace that gave me second birth

I've followed his leading, I've preached his name
Going where he sends me and following His ways

I followed God and I was thrown in prison
My companions with me were locked away

Yet we prayed and praised and our chains fell off
We prayed and praised and the doors unlocked

Though while in prison we despaired for life
In our weakness and our worship, God saw our plight
He broke the chains from our wrists, the walls around us split
Having the opportunity to escape, we didn't take it
That witness led the jailer to take on new life
Instead of throwing it away and widowing his wife
If you're willing to be used, you'll see lives transformed
He'll be faithful through the trials and the violence of the storm

The storms of life
The winds of the enemy
The waves of the sea
Even when it seems as though we're going underneath

Caught in a raging storm
Tossed by the angry waves
Tormented by the wind
Driven towards land

We made it out alive

So the lesson is trust in God
He's there in the midst of hardship
Giving strength where we would fail
Giving hope when death seems real
Building us up when we are weak
He is the fullness we constantly seek

My life has been anything but easy
Following God is never easy

But all the suffering was worth it
Knowing my pain bore witness to my Savior
My God made a way for me
If pain's my price I'll gladly pay
Everything in this world will come to pass
Suffering lasting but a moment
My life is but a vapor
In the face of eternity

11. (a)thanatos 4:26
Waking up in the cold and dark
I hear their footsteps coming, it's so ironic
'Cause we started here so long ago
I chose hatred over grace
Look where it got me
Loving violence over mercy
Killing innocent men
The same old thing happens yet again
Just like Jesus, Stephen, and the prophets
Humanity killing off God's chosen ones

Though I long to go
I feel there's more work for me to do
If I stay they're edified
If I go, I go to Christ

I'm so torn

I know I've rune the race
Running for the prize
I know I've fought the fight
Victories seen by heaven's eyes

Both my triumphs and my sufferings giving glory to my King
That's why I'm here at the end of my life, sitting in this prison cell, waiting for my demise

But this present suffering pales against the glories to come
This present anguish a jewel in the crown of life

I long to see heaven open up
I long to worship my King
Face to face
Before His throne of grace

My Father's calling me
Still there's people wandering and squandering their lives for something unworthy of following
It's time to pass the torch to all the ministers who've followed me
And pass into the greatness of His glory 'cause these bones are weak

I'm ready to ascend into the presence of the Most High
Man it's been a long ride
Seen a lot of miracles
I'm ready for a body not confined by the boundaries of gravity
I have established that everything I've been establishing here has amounted to the final ascension
I'm about to fall on my knees at the feet of my King
Forever and ever in heaven

It's time to let go of tears that I've cried
There is no reason to run or to hide
I've been in the kingdom of the world for a long time and my reward is up in the sky
I didn't deserve it
I used to murder these people but grace has made me alive
How is it that I have been blessed just to serve at the feet of the God who has given us time
I'm ready to go
I'm leaving my shoes at the door and preparing for death and to be made alive
This world I am leaving it better than when I arrived
It's time to escape from corruption and evil and sin and temptation and all of the lies
I'm standing at the gates of heaven and I'm ready as ever to open them up and walk inside

I hear them at my door
They're here to drag me away
I stood the trial
I passed the test

Now do what you will
The best is yet to come for me
Take this body, and its life
I'll enter heaven's afterlife
Now

12. The Commission 2:32

EXTENDED EDITION BONUS TRACKS
13. Waves Of Fire (ALAL Edition) 3:31
We started a fire within
It's not hard to see
It will burn eternally
We have come alive
And we've been set on fire

Come now and taste the lies you have produced
Come now and see the disaster you have caused
Waves of fire will consume, consume everything

Bow down before him
See the glory pouring form his head
Come forth, experience the pain
The deceivers will fall

There's no getting away
Waves of fire will consume, consume everything

You can't get away
They'll carry you down, carry you down
The deceivers will fall

The waves of fire will carry you down
They will carry you down
Waves of fire

You'll meet the waves, and the Son will show
And now you'll see the end
What has been foretold, but ignored
Meet the one who you refused

We started a fire within
It's not hard to see
It will burn eternally
We have come alive
And we've been set on fire

We have come alive
We have come alive
We have come alive
We have come alive

14. Stephen II - Stephen's Quest For NES 3:57
15. Blind Sight (Zachotomy Remix) 4:01
16. Redirection (Victor Maklakov Remix) 4:06
17. Fury (String Quartet Edition) 5:12
18. Jews And Djentiles (Played On The Piano) 8:04




Face The Storm - Redux (EP, October 24, 2016, Independent) (Digital)

A remaster of the EP of the same name.

1. Compass 4:23
2. Bearing The Mark 3:57
3. Art Of Filth 3:58
4. Vessels Of Destruction 3:59
5. The Heart Of The Father 5:34




Djoy To The World (single, November 25, 2016, Independent) (Digital)

1. Djoy To The World 3:38
Joy to the world
The Lord is come
Let earth receive her King
Let every heart
Prepare Him room
And heaven and nature sing

No more let sins and sorrows grow
Nor thorns infest the ground
He comes to make His blessings flow
Far as the curse is found

Let men their songs employ
Repeat, repeat, the sounding joy
Let heaven and nature sing
The glories of our king

Let every heart
Prepare Him room
And heaven and nature sing
And heaven and nature sing
While fields and floods
Rocks, hills and plains
Repeat the sounding joy
Repeat the sounding joy

Joy to the world
The Lord is come
Let earth receive her King
Let every heart
Prepare Him room
And heaven and nature sing
While fields and floods
Rocks, hills and plains
Repeat the sounding joy

Repeat the sounding joy
Repeat the sounding joy
Repeat the sounding joy
Repeat the sounding joy




In The Grave (single, February 16, 2018, Independent) (Digital)

1. In The Grave 3:59
Can someone save me from the pit
This grave I dug myself, it's filling in?
I built up my walls, created the divide
But now they're caving in, I'm trapped inside

Now I see
The lies that I have believed
Promises of life and fame and fulfillment and self
A sweet, sweet pill with a bitter end

Lay me down inside my grave
I know I'm broken, can I be remade?
Lay me down underneath the ground
I know I'm lost, can I ever be found?

I'm screaming for help, can no one hear the sound?

I spent so long chasing empty dreams
But still you stood there calling me
I pursued the shining gold the wine so red
The bandit, the harlot, the faithless friend

Beaten and abused and left for dead
I had no hope until you took me in
My self-inflicted wounds you began to heal
You filled the emptiness and took away the pain I used to feel

Why did I take so long?
What was I hiding from?

I will never go back
Never go back, not going back
I will never go back
Never go back, not going back

I've been like a withered tree
Growing in the dry bed of a desert stream
I drove my roots into an anchor of sand
But the rain stopped coming to this barren land

I wandered from the path, was lost in the weeds
But you never abandoned me
Dig, dig, dig til I'm 6 feet down in the deep
Still you never abandoned me

I will never go back
Never go back, not going back
I will never go back
Never go back, not going back

You saved me from the pit
The grave I dug myself, you filled it in
The life I lived is buried there
I'll never go back, not going back




(D E S) O L A T E (single, November 10, 2018, Independent) (Digital)

1. (D E S) O L A T E 4:23
Sister, there's so much that's left unsaid
Like the hole that's in my heart
And the knife stuck in your back

Betrayed by those we love and left all alone
With no father to give us direction where we should go
Suppressing emotions to get you by and expecting it to last a lifetime
We can't go on living beneath these lies

I promise to hold you up when you're took weak to stand
On your own

With every bit of strength left in me
I will rebuild what's been taken within

And they were gone within an instant
Vanished before our eyes
How much can one endure until they've completely run dry?
And so we watched our father die
Our whole world, it fell apart
I watched you give it all to a man who never cared for your heart

Desolate

When will enough be enough?
When will this ever end?
I replay these thoughts over and over
I am stuck on repeat

Sister, it kills me to have seen you like this
I will hold on just for you
So we can see this to the end
I will do my best to silence my thoughts
So I don't suffocate and end up like the rest

God breathe life into these broken souls
Restart our hearts and make us whole
Make us whole

I refuse to let you fall

Somehow I'll see us through this
Even if we're the only ones left standing here
Always I'll be right here
This comes straight from my heart
A brother's love lasts forever




Letters From A Broken Heart (album, July 5, 2019, Sancrosanct Records) (CD, Digital)

1. Flatline 0:58
I'm losing my sense of direction
I can feel my heart give in
This is the beginning of my end

Flatline

2. Bitter 4:12
These words that are written in pen
Are like a loaded gun to my head
You've pulled the trigger one thousand times
And I still feel the pain every time I died

Why is it that I never get the closure that I need to move on?
And that I'm always left behind second-guessing my life
Do you remember, do you remember
When you would call me brother?

When you would call me brother?
Oof!

A bond unbreakable
Trust, love, and respect
Honor until the end
Did it ever mean a thing to you?
Did it ever mean a damn thing to you?

I can't escape from this prison
These walls around me are caving in (Caving in)
I'm reaching out but you let me go
And now I'm all alone (Now I'm all alone)
So go ahead and live your life (Live your life)
And pretend like I don't exist (Like I don't exist)
Will you even miss me when I am gone?

Now I'm all alone

You left me
You left me

Why am I so obsessed with approval?
Especially when I'm looking for yours
The silence was more than enough to kill me
And it's killing me
How could you throw me away?
Like I'm worthless and disgusting
I guess I never meant anything to you
'Cause all you see is a self-righteous bastard

I am so fed up believing things will be the same
Oh, who am I kidding?

I'm dying a little bit more on the inside
And each day is a struggle to survive
There's no one I can trust
There is no one
All my friends have turned their back on me
Maybe I'm better off this way
Dying alone

These words that are written in pen have blown a hole straight through my head
Watch the light begin to fade from my eyes
There is no turning back
I'll rest in peace tonight

Goodbye to the friend I knew
Goodbye, I'm sure you'll miss me too
Goodbye to the life I knew
Goodbye, I'm sure you'll miss me
No one will miss me

3. Hang Up 4:45
My emotions have been veiled for far too long
The seams are ripping
This rage can't be contained
My stomach is churning solely at the thought of you intoxicated

We're addicted to what gets us by
We're addicted to what makes us happy
We're addicted to what helps us sleep at night
We're addicted to our pride and selfishness

I'm not one for pointing fingers but I'm so done with this
Years of watching those I love succumb to ignorant bliss
I remember the night with your hands gripped around my neck
Oh God I've been trying to make myself forget

I shut my eyes and pretend everything is alright
But when they give in I feel part of me die
No one will ever know what was taken from me
Taken from me

This has never been easy for me and I don't think that it will ever be

How can my soul ever be at rest?
When my heart's bursting through my chest
I took a glance into your hollow eyes to see a father who lived to die
Nothing I do will bring him back
But the memory forever lies within

The memory of him forever lies within
Forever lies within

I shut my eyes and pretend everything is alright
But when they give in I feel part of me die
No one will ever know what was taken from me
Taken from me

All I want is to forget
All I want is to forget
All I want is to forget
All I want is to for you to come home

4. Confessions 1:22
Dear friends, I can't seem to remember the last time I felt alive
Quite honestly it's been so long since I've felt anything at all
My heart aches and my body trembles as the thoughts begin to swell in my mind

Leaving me with nothing except emptiness and lust
The bitter cycle that has me in shackles
She clawed at my door and I let her in
I'm sorry my friends
I'm not the man you believed me to be

I feel a disconnect between myself and your heart
I can't breathe; pulse is fading
Now I'm stuck at the start
Will there ever be any hope for me?
'Cause I am drowning in this ocean of agony

You are nothing
A disgrace
A failure
You amount to nothing
Sink deeper

5. Desolate 4:21
Sister, there's so much that's left unsaid
Like the hole that's in my heart
And the knife stuck in your back

Betrayed by those we love and left all alone
With no father to give us direction where we should go
Suppressing emotions to get you by and expecting it to last a lifetime
We can't go on living beneath these lies

I promise to hold you up when you're took weak to stand
On your own

With every bit of strength left in me
I will rebuild what's been taken within

And they were gone within an instant
Vanished before our eyes
How much can one endure until they've completely run dry?
And so we watched our father die
Our whole world, it fell apart
I watched you give it all to a man who never cared for your heart

Desolate

When will enough be enough?
When will this ever end?
I replay these thoughts over and over
I am stuck on repeat

Sister, it kills me to have seen you like this
I will hold on just for you
So we can see this to the end
I will do my best to silence my thoughts
So I don't suffocate and end up like the rest

God breathe life into these broken souls
Restart our hearts and make us whole
Make us whole

I refuse to let you fall

Somehow I'll see us through this
Even if we're the only ones left standing here
Always I'll be right here
This comes straight from my heart
A brother's love lasts forever

6. Riven 4:30
There is something clearly wrong with me
Something in my mind is not okay
(Okay, okay, okay, okay)
And I can't seem to face the day
(I'm not okay)

My soul is tied to sin like a noose from a tree
Where misguided hands are free to take piece of me
I tried to do everything that's right
I've become the failure I feared I might
I've been swayed to and fro
With no stability for my roots to grow
All my branches have withered away
And all that's left is decay

Who am I?
What is left of me?
Will I ever find my true identity?
I've been searching in the void hoping to find my purpose
'Cause I'm convinced I am worthless

Peel back the flesh
Open up my chest to reveal
Everything in me that I've tried to conceal

Everything is finally exposed
This is the life I chose, this is the life I chose
Everything is finally exposed
This is the life I chose, this is the life I chose

I've tried so hard to be your worthy son
It's impossible to undo the damage that's been done to me
God send me hell 'cause I deserve to burn like the rest

I betrayed the Father and abandoned the Son
I betrayed the Father for the sake of pleasing everyone
I betrayed the Father and abandoned the Son
For the sake of pleasing everyone

7. Remembrance 1:49
8. Bad Dream 4:32
I found a passion at the age of five
A burning light inside my soul
Then with absolutely no warning the spark was snuffed out
Now I'm lost in the dark
So now I'm all alone; my best friends are my fear and doubt
Crawling on the floor, clawing at the walls; trying to find a way out

Bad dream
Make it stop
Make it stop
Bad dream
Let me wake up

Slipping into the sorrow inside my mind
No one sees the chaos behind these eyes
I'm sinking
Sinking
Just say goodbye
Let me go
Let me go
Let me go
I'll be fine

Let me go
I'll be fine
Let me go
I'm not fine

I still believe that there's a purpose for my life
But it's getting harder
Harder to see it, my vision clouded by the strife
When something you've taken for granted is taken away
It can bring you to your knees

I'm sick of being sick
I'm tired of being tired
I'm broken and it's breaking me
Trapped inside my brain with no hope for victory
'Cause every second of my life is plagued by doubt
I don't think I will ever get out
It's breaking me
This curse is never-ending

Slipping into the sorrow inside my mind
No one sees the chaos behind these eyes
I'm sinking
Sinking
Just say goodbye
Let me go
Let me go
Let me go
I'll be fine

I'll only get better, I'll never get worse
I'll never get better, I'll only get worse
I'll only get better, I'll never get worse
I'll never get better

This torture will end, I'll be set free from the curse
I want to believe the better things that I have heard
But the voices in my head are screaming these words
The voices are screaming

Never better
Only worse

9. Rest 2:08
10. The End 4:22
A relationship mired in difficulty
Actions are triggered that can't be undone
Father can you hear my voice tremble
This conversation has only just begun
These words slip from my mouth so quickly
Sometimes I wish that you'd never called me son

My anger builds as the darkness grows
Deadly poison pours like fire from my mouth
A long history becomes exposed
After years of silence, it finally comes out
Showing no mercy and no restraint
Cutting you down with the toxic words that I say
A knife penetrating straight to your deepest fears
These remarks that I can't ever unsay

Oh God
I can never unsay

I did not hesitate to put you in your place
But I can't shake the feeling this was a mistake

Unforeseen your life is ended in a flash
With words regretted still lingering
Instantly panic starts to set in
I can't fix what I've done because I realize

Your life has ended
Life ended

Is this the hell that I damned you to
Caused by the pain I put you through?

Is this the predetermined outcome
Of false words that were spoken in hatred?

This is the hell that I damned you to
A piece of me that was forever left with you

This is the final resting place for you
As you left this world before the time had come for you

This is the end

Though the end has come my mind will not cease
Thoughts batter my mind keeping me from sleep
Your name repeated breaks me at the seams
Even coming into my dreams




No Return (single, July 17, 2020, Sancrosanct Records) (Digital)

1. No Return 3:53
In that moment life seemed serene
Until you took away the thing that made me, me
Raped my innocence
Raped my innocence
Stripped of fidelity
Lost sense of reality
Raped my innocence
Raped my innocence
Nothing left to give
Nothing else remains in me
I made you my God
A first and final mistake
I placed my life within your hands
A swift stroke and now I'm exposed from the inside out
Left to rot with all of my self doubt
Hate, pain, fear, rage
Enslaved to your game
Just a victim to your sick satisfactions
I played right into your hand
Hoping to find some comfort from when I left my life behind
With every second that passes me by
The louder the voices tell me I should end my life
Maybe they're right
Maybe they're right
Just let me die
Sinking in the shadows as my mind goes numb
Fingers on the trigger looking down the barrel of a gun
Demons dance around me saying you'll never be free
And all that I can see is what you did to me
I am numb
I am gone
Nothing can bring me home




Hate Speech (single, December 4, 2020, Sancrosanct Records) (Digital)

1. Hate Speech 4:01
It's like I'm frozen in time
Trapped inside this mirror with glass walls as frail as my mind
It's like I was born to break
Take a step back 'cause I'm about to suffocate
Short fused
Your hate speech is killing me
You've left me in my misery
I need to break free from these insecurities that are keeping me
From letting this go
Freedom's at the tip of my tongue but I can't let it go
I can't let it go
Forgive and forget is what they say
Turn back the clock so I can make it go away
Recognize what you have become
I want no part in this
No part with you
My body grows weary from this deadweight on my shoulders
Desperate to escape from these horrors
I'm lost in this trance that's driving me to the edge of insanity
Separate from the toxicity that divides us all
My life is so empty
Beaten down by ruthless hate
I want to end it all
Forgive and forget is what they say
Turn back the clock so I can make it go away
Hate speech
Every word you speak tears me apart
Breathes death in my bones
Brings life to my living hell




Misery Season (EP, July 2, 2021, Sancrosanct Records) (CD, Digital)

1. Love 1:04
2. F.F.F. 3:46
Spiraling
Is this too good to be true
Or have the cards been dealt in my favor
I lived a life without knowing love
Until you came into the picture
Head over heels I'm falling face first
Spiraling
All my life I've knowing nothing but pain
From my father's fists to my mother's hate
Then you came and took it away
I found comfort in solace
And I am safe
Rescue me
From the plague that infects my soul
Comfort me
I need to know that you'll never leave my side
Set me free
And I'll make you my saving grace
My heart is laced with the serum in your veins
You are the cure
The antidote to my infection
You are the cure
My absolute
My everything
I'll let down my defenses and dismantle the doubt that has rendered my useless
I was cold to the touch
You breathed life in my lungs and gave me a reason to live
But what if it's all just a façade
And I'm playing right into the trap that you laid for me
I can feel the conflict arising
I am a different shade of jaded
Cut me open, watch my pulse start fading
Eyes dilating, my heart raging, asphyxiating
I am a different shade of jaded
Cut me open, watch my pulse start fading
Eyes dilating, my heart raging, asphyxiating

3. Hate Speech 3:54
It's like I'm frozen in time
Trapped inside this mirror with glass walls as frail as my mind
It's like I was born to break
Take a step back 'cause I'm about to suffocate
Short fused
Your hate speech is killing me
You've left me in my misery
I need to break free from these insecurities that are keeping me
From letting this go
Freedom's at the tip of my tongue but I can't let it go
I can't let it go
Forgive and forget is what they say
Turn back the clock so I can make it go away
Recognize what you have become
I want no part in this
No part with you
My body grows weary from this deadweight on my shoulders
Desperate to escape from these horrors
I'm lost in this trance that's driving me to the edge of insanity
Separate from the toxicity that divides us all
My life is so empty
Beaten down by ruthless hate
I want to end it all
Forgive and forget is what they say
Turn back the clock so I can make it go away
Hate speech
Every word you speak tears me apart
Breathes death in my bones
Brings life to my living hell

4. Violence 2:13
I sit here thinking how this has come to pass
Anticipation builds, anxiety consumes
Is this the final act, where the curtains close
Fear flows through my veins as silence moves on

I hear your footsteps as they echo down the hall
Will this be the day that you decide to end it all
I sit here trembling, you've robbed me of my life
In my own mind I fear I never will find the light

You look right through me as if I wasn't there
My frame invisible as I wither in fear
Even in the silence
Violence

Even in the silence
There is violence

Given reprieve from terror I've felt inside
Still darkness fills me, thoughts echoing in my mind
I take one final glance at the person I used to be
The voices telling me I should leave it behind

5. No Return 3:47
In that moment life seemed serene
Until you took away the thing that made me, me
Raped my innocence
Raped my innocence
Stripped of fidelity
Lost sense of reality
Raped my innocence
Raped my innocence
Nothing left to give
Nothing else remains in me
I made you my God
A first and final mistake
I placed my life within your hands
A swift stroke and now I'm exposed from the inside out
Left to rot with all of my self doubt
Hate, pain, fear, rage
Enslaved to your game
Just a victim to your sick satisfactions
I played right into your hand
Hoping to find some comfort from when I left my life behind
With every second that passes me by
The louder the voices tell me I should end my life
Maybe they're right
Maybe they're right
Just let me die
Sinking in the shadows as my mind goes numb
Fingers on the trigger looking down the barrel of a gun
Demons dance around me saying you'll never be free
And all that I can see is what you did to me
I am numb
I am gone
Nothing can bring me home

6. Escape Artist 5:14
Sever the ties that have left me in bondage
Sever the ties
Beaten, bloodied, black and blue (Black and blue)
You won't let up until you're through (with me)
I watched as the blade was held against my neck
My heart sinks in my chest for this might be my end
Fading in and out of consciousness
I need to pull it together
If I want to escape from this madness that has left me in shambles
My eyes lock onto his as the rage settles in
Hatred, anguish, torment
Hatred, anguish, torment
You left me with
Hatred, anguish, torment
Hatred, anguish, torment

What did I ever see in you
I was promised the world but you tore it in two
You're not a man but the devil in the flesh
The fires of your hell burn a hole in my chest

Oh God, I need you now
I'm burning out, I'm blacking out, I'm breaking down
Tired of doing this on my own
The lifelessness as you lay me to rest
Fading away
I was driven to insanity
Beaten down by your ruthless hate
My first and final mistake
Was when I looked away from everything
That made me who I am
Escape was worth the pain
My worth is greater than your hate
So now I'll forgive and forget
Learn to heal from the past, and erase the regret
Oh God, make me whole




Something To Feel (single, December 10, 2021, Independent) (Digital)

1. Something To Feel 4:32
If I could bring these feelings to life
Then they would become the rope
I would tie them around my neck
So the whole world could watch me choke

Now here lies a broken man
Defective and diseased (Defective and diseased)
Maybe one day someone will see
The very best in me

Why does it have to be me?

I'm searching for love
I'm searching for answers
I'm trying to find my way out of this nightmare
I'm hopelessly lost
So cold and abandoned
I'm trying to feel what is real

How many times will it take for me to get the memo?
Hands begin to shake
Heart begins to ache from burdens that have left me shallow
Why do I let them in?
Only to let them down?
With good intentions comes the risk of leaving them to drown
I can't seem to understand
Or grasp the reasons why
I'm stuck in this cycle of misery
While the rest just leave me behind

Friend, do you remember when you called me brother?
Father, did you care to think about your son?
Lover, what happened to forever?
Left alone, I think I'm going numb

Friend, why did you have to let me go?
Father, why did you take your life?
Lover, was I never enough?
Left alone and out of time

I'm searching for love
I'm searching for answers
I'm trying to find my way out of this nightmare
I'm hopelessly lost
So cold and abandoned
I'm trying to feel what is real

There is nothing left to feel
There is nothing left to feel

There is nothing left to feel (Nothing left to feel)
There is nothing left to feel (Nothing left to feel)
There is nothing left to feel (Nothing left to feel)
Except the blade beneath my skin (Blade beneath my skin)
There is nothing left to feel (Nothing left to feel)
There is nothing left to feel (Nothing left to feel)
There is nothing left to feel (Nothing left to feel)
Except the blade that's beneath